Worthy

I am worthy, not because of what I know, not because of what I do, but simply because I am. I am, and so therefore, I am worthy. A person may base self-esteem on what they know, possess or how they look, but struggle endlessly to live up to their never-ending perceived potential because they lack a strong foundation of self-worth…When you embrace your self-worth, you know you are sufficient; you are okay as you are, even during times when you feel low and discouraged.    (Paraphrased)-Bukeka

Another word for worthy could be “capable of.” We all have the capacity to accept peace and grace into our lives. However, we often disable a state of acceptance because we feel unworthy. 

“When we come from, start with, an unconditional acceptance of ourselves, instead of operating from a place of anxious striving, we will discover a relaxed and grounded sense of being within ourselves. Knowing we are worthy, we can authentically engage with our life, through all its joys and challenges.” —Bob Edelstein

Allow for forgiveness in your life. Making mistakes is an inherent human quality. If you don’t make mistakes, you are definitely not a typical human being anymore. If we are unable to forgive ourselves our missteps, we will never be able to properly forgive others, or have a healthy relationships.

“Each individual is responsible for their own fortunes and misfortunes. Each individual needs to work their own deliverance by understanding and effort. Rather than addressing sinners with such words as ‘shameful,’ ‘wicked,’ ‘wretched,’ ‘unworthy,’ and ‘blasphemous’ merely say, ‘you are unwise in acting in such a way, since this will bring sorrow upon yourselves and others.’” —Maezumi Roshi

What if I could put away self-denigration and begin to reframe my self-perspective as moments and choices that are simply unwise and not useful? What would it be like, how would I feel, right now, if I did not have any feelings of unworthiness? 

“Many children were told that they were a bad boy or girl. An act may be “bad” or unwise, but the person need not be labeled as “bad.” If statements of discipline were not offset by demonstrations of parental love, the unconscious will link their perceived badness with their feeling unworthy of love.”-Dr. Rick Moss

Many of us feel bad about something in the past. If we have not properly addressed the difficulty, we permit and promote that negativity to define and discolor our present state of being, which will influence how our future unfolds. Do we criticize others or ourselves, have an accusatory, negative outlook, avoid honestly looking at who WE are and what are healthy ways to engage in life?

We can’t only quit our addiction. Our sense of who we are is embedded in our addiction. If we only quit an addiction, chemical or behavioral, we leave a hole that seems to need filling. If we have not gone through a behavioral change we will revert back to our addiction as the only recourse, as nothing better has filled the hole.  We must also choose to engage in growth that supports our sense of worth. We must actively pursue a mindset, activities and decisions that bring us into the “Sunlight of the Spirit.”  Through a regular acceptance of and engagement in life, we begin to celebrate and embrace our life, and feel our connection with all others. As our self-pity disappears, as the craving for the old behavior of avoidance, hiding and grasping fades, we feel the innate, natural sense of connection and worthiness fill and guide us.

Many use a recovery program and or counceling, and other programs to begin engaging the true worthy self.  We use prayer, meditation and awareness at all times of our behavior to begin validating our true selves, and actively choose engagement and acceptance as our new behavior, replacing the darkness. We need to have a NEW way that we view the world and ourselves. This only happens when we take the necessary steps to begin, and then keep up a regimen of healthy behavior. We cannot just hope for the best, we need to work on it every day. We don’t brush our teeth just once and say, “good I got it, all done.”

We will feel a sense of loss when we begin to change our negative “poor me” or “look at them” energy into a healthier, fuller life experience. Our difficulties are familiar and, in a way, comfortable. We identify with them. We have a sense of “that” is who I am, “that” is just how my life is. When we challenge that sense of self, and start losing it, we go through withdrawal. Without a sense of negativity or avoidance in our lives, we are not sure who we are. 

People who live “wholeheartedly” have the discipline to take care of the small things. They are attentive and aware of themselves and their environment, and care for it in a manner that speaks of their respect for themselves and the world. They are more capable of dealing with the difficulties and variations life will always bring. We can care for our environment, our vehicle, our living space or work place by being attentive to them (but not obsessively). We can care for ourselves with healthy food, exercise and sleep. We can have patience with others, and not belittle anyone, especially ourselves. These actions come from and sustain a sense of feeling capable kind and worthy.

A great deal of chaos in the world occurs because people don’t appreciate themselves, having never developed sympathy and gentleness toward themselves. We have to accept personal responsibility for uplifting our lives. When we don’t punish or condemn ourselves, when we relax, we begin to contact the essential quality of Basic Goodness in ourselves. This nature can be developed in daily life so that it radiates out to family, friends, community and society. 

Use the lines “I am a good person, I am a kind person, I am a strong person”  as part of your meditation.
Say each line over and over, and let it resonate until it is truly felt. 

When you feel yourself being negative and feeling unworthy, breathe deeply, relax, take a couple of minutes to say the above lines to yourself.

Simply the recognition, the awareness, of what you are doing and knowing that you have the choice to feel unworthy or to feel worthy, capable and peaceful, is large. 

Every human being has a fundamental nature of Basic Goodness. We begin to touch into this unconditional state through prayer, meditation and mindfulness. And we cement this goodness, this worthiness through a consistent practice of caring for ourselves. Happiness comes from within; do not look for it without.

“Great is the matter of birth and death. Life slips quickly by. Time waits for no one. Wake up! Wake up! Don’t waste a moment.”-Zen saying

How do you fill your bucket? One drop at a time
The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step
The great arises out of small things that are honored and cared for
May you be well. May you be happy. May you find peace.

Heart Of Recovery web site  — fcheartofrecovery.com