3-5-17 Happy


Where is eternal happiness? It’s not in the sky or in the jungle; you won’t find it in the air or under the ground. You won’t find it in avoidance behaviors or the drugs you used to take. Everlasting happiness is within you, within your psyche, your consciousness, your mind. That’s why it’s important that you investigate the nature of your own mind.
You do not need something else, or more things, to make you happy, you have the capacity of happiness in you right now.

Research shows that happiness is not the result of bouncing from one joy to the next; achieving happiness typically involves times of considerable discomfort. Negative emotions are not only crucial to our existence but also—ironically—to feeling good. To live fully in the world and endure its challenges, it’s necessary to engage the full range of psychological states we’ve inherited as humans. We use our emotions to guide us to a better understanding of ourselves. But we do not become overwhelmed by them or promote them.

Money is important to happiness, but only to the point that it buys freedom from worry about the basics in life—housing, food, clothing. Beyond caring for our basic needs, things can distance us from our real happiness. How many TV channels do you have? How many THINGS do you have or need? How much time is spent on instant communications and entertainment.

Primary Control relates to the capacity to make changes to your environment to suit your needs or desires, while Secondary Control is about making changes within yourself to adapt to your environment.
Secondary control — the acceptance of what can’t be controlled externally — was found to be just as important as primary control in determining the life satisfaction

5 aspects that we control,( Primary Control), that add or detract to happiness.
One – Social involvement with friends and family.
Two – Exercise and physical activity. Some activity and exercise needs to be just for fun, not attached to an accomplishment or goal, just doing something you like to. Non-competative fun. Vary your activities, don’t be predictable, variety is a spice. Try something new and different. Three – A sense that you are contributing to a Community. That you have a connection to people in general, and are contributing positively to that community. Social bonding.
Four – Have compassion for others. Less judgement and more acceptance, which is where you may learn something about yourself and relationships.
Five – Involve yourself more in the natural world, and less in the speedy often superficial world we have made. Less time on computers, idle chatter, or constantly being electronically connected. Take more walks. Be more mindful of whatever you are doing. Waiting for happiness lasts forever. You are waiting for what is already present.

Practice compassion, at every moment. loving-kindness meditation and mentality can increase positive emotions and lead to more positive relationships over time.
Connect with others who support your journey.
An acceptance of what can’t be changed is a significant predictor of life satisfaction. As is being diligent with what you can control. When you don’t act on what you should change, when you have a distasteful task that you should do, and keep putting off, you can feel it eroding into your calm and happiness. You need to DO it.

Be happy for this moment. This moment is your life. Omar Khayyam

Happiness is when – what you think, what you say, and what you do, are in harmony. Mahatma Gandhi

To live Honorably, is one of the most important aspects of feeling good about yourself and being happy and content. To respect yourself and the actions you take. To live with integrity and ethics.
When actions are preceded with an awareness of the community that you belong to, and respect for others, a sense of rightness and contentment ensues.

Flow, being fully present, is one of the keys to happiness, because if we can experience flow working on the assembly line, chances are we will be happy, whereas if we don’t have flow while lounging at a luxury resort, we are not going to be happy. You can train your mind to let go of the things of the past that are done and finished, and of the future that you negatively project about, or have expectations about.
Let go of needing to change or fix your friends, work mates, or partner. You may be a pain in the ass to some of them also. Accept them, change your fixing mentality to acceptance, and you will be able to see the many good things about others. And see and understand when they struggle as you do.

Notice small things more, the sky, the book on the table, the rug, the dishes, your shoes, when you are walking, and feel it all. Look at things more deeply and begin to see them. When you are doing anything, be doing that fully. This needs practice, as we are used to being in our busy heads too much, for no good reason.

“Above all, be at ease, be as natural and spacious as possible. Slip quietly out of the noose of your habitual anxious self, release all grasping, and relax into your true nature,”“Think of your ordinary emotional, thought-ridden self as a block of ice or a slab of butter left out in the sun. If you are feeling hard and cold, let this aggression melt away in the sunlight of your meditation.” Sogyal Rinpoche.

Being happy lets us use our wisdom and relate to a larger world, where we know how to be of use and benefit in a larger sense, and we know we belong.
You are worth it and you can do it. Even if a little bit at a time. Keep going, always.
Smile more, bark and whine less.

How do you fill your bucket? One drop at a time.
The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step.
The great arises out of small things that are honored and cared for.
Heart Of Recovery web site – fcheartofrecovery.com